What Happens In Patagonia
by MandyinKC
Summary: Rita Skeeter's poisoned quill strikes again. How will the Weasleys react to her latest lies, especially those concerning the younger set?


Author's Note: This story owes a lot to the wonderful keeptheotherone. Not only did she beta it for me, but it was through discussion of JK Rowling's recent Pottermore post with ktoo that this story was born. _AND _as a special treat, she will be posting her own Patagonia-inspired fic tomorrow.

Disclaimer: The characters, world and setting belong to JK Rowling.

* * *

What Happens In Patagonia...

Teddy Lupin stuck his blue head inside Charlie Weasley's tent to see the man himself sitting at a table with his adopted son, Pax, over tea. Charlie had the _Daily Prophet's_ Special Quidditch section spread open before him as he tipped back in his chair. Pax looked up from his own page of the newspaper with a crooked grin.

"Well, if it isn't Wolf Boy himself."

Charlie shot Pax a dirty look. "Don't call him that."

"'Morning, Dragon Breath," Teddy responded with a crooked grin. He took one of the chairs, spun it around and straddled it.

The other teenage boy prepared a cup of tea, and set it before Teddy.

"Cheers, mate." The metamorphmagus took his first sip of tea.

Pax smirked. "How's it feel to be snogging Victoire in every dark corner of the camp?"

Choking and spluttering, Teddy sprayed tea everywhere. "Wh-what?"

"Nice, Lupin." Charlie wiped tea and spit from his shirt. "Wild _and_ ill-mannered."

"What are you lot on about?" Teddy demanded.

Father and son laughed. Pax tossed the newspaper at Teddy. With a glare, he picked it up to see a headline about Dumbledore's Army and Rita Skeeter's byline. The old hag. Somehow Teddy wasn't surprised that Skeeter was behind whatever had Charlie and Pax so wound up. It didn't happen often (Teddy reckoned the old bat was afraid of Uncle Harry), but Skeeter did drag Teddy into the papers on occasion.

"You'll want to skip to the second column, second from last paragraph," Charlie said helpfully.

Scanning through, Teddy saw the usual tripe about his supposed wildness. Honestly, one blown up toilet and he never lived it down—how was he supposed to know that Flitwick would be using the facilities at the precise moment that the Big Bangs Exploding Dung Bomb went off? Oh, and then the usual about his dead parents, as if he were the only war orphan. The dark-haired boy sitting across from him was proof otherwise. Teddy didn't see how this warranted all the hilarity…

"Oh, shite," Teddy gasped. His face went white and his hair turned pale yellow.

"You kiss your granny with that mouth?" Charlie asked.

"Vic! That-that bitch wrote about _Vic?"_

"Watch the language, even if it is an accurate description."

…_Mr and Mrs Bill Weasley might like to know that their beautiful, blonde daughter Victoire seems to be attracted to any dark corner where Master Lupin happens to be lurking. The good news is that both of them seem to have invented a method of breathing through their ears. I can think of no other reason how they have survived such prolonged periods of what, in my young day, was called 'snogging.'*_

Red surged into Teddy's face, and his hair looked like an open flame. Teddy didn't care what that awful woman wrote about him. He'd come to terms with the Rita Skeeters of the world ages ago. It kind of went with the territory, being Harry Potter's godson. When Teddy was younger, he'd get mad when Skeeter said something nasty about Uncle Harry or Aunt Ginny, the same way Jamie did now, but Uncle Harry had taught Teddy how to ignore it. How it only mattered that he and the people he loved knew the truth. But to drag sweet, shy Victoire through the mud was something else altogether. She wasn't in the public eye like Uncle Harry, and she was only 14.

Teddy balled up the paper and chucked it into the bin.

"Oi, I wasn't done with that!" Pax protested.

"How could that…_woman_…say such things about Vic?" Teddy demanded.

"Everybody got a mention," Charlie said from behind his paper. "Even me. I am still unmarried. _Why?" _

Lavender chose that moment to come in wearing Charlie's _Dragonkeepers Like It Hot_ t-shirt and nothing else. Teddy averted his eyes. Even with the scars, Lavender was pretty…well, hot, but she was Uncle Harry's age, for Merlin's sake! It felt just wrong to look at her legs. Which were hot. Besides, he'd earned more than one cuff upside the head from Charlie for that.

"Did you hear, babe?" Charlie said conversationally. "Rita Skeeter wants to know why I'm not married. So does my mum, while we are at it. And me, too, for that matter."

Lavender picked up a teacup and filled it. After taking a sip, she replied, "I've made that mistake once. Why would I repeat it? By the way, where are your readers, old man?"

She turned on her heel and walked back to the bedroom. Teddy felt like he could breathe again.

"Gray hair and reading glasses," Charlie grumbled. "Next thing I know, it will be afternoon naps and gruel for breakfast."

"No, the next thing will be a son who is of age in less than six months," Pax replied with a cheeky grin.

"Don't remind me."

"You lot!" Teddy exploded. "Can we concentrate on this-this slander? We are talking about your goddaughter here, and how her reputation has been compromised."

"By you, apparently," Charlie said. He Summoned his spectacles and put them on.

"No!"

"Well, according to the paper, you've been compromising her virtue all over the camp," snickered Pax.

"That's not…I would never…How can you say that about…Vic would never snog me!"

Pax and Charlie were laughing again. The miserable bastards.

"Are you completely blind, Lupin?" Pax demanded. "Vic would jump at the chance to snog you. She's fancied you since we were all little."

Teddy flapped his lips for a moment before he could properly form words. "Rubbish! Victoire would never fancy somebody like me. She-she could have anybody. She's the most beautiful girl in the world, you know she is."

"Which makes it all the more confusing why she would want you, yes," Pax said. "But she does."

"No, no that's not possible." Teddy shook his head. "She's beautiful, and we've known each other forever, and I am her cousin."

"Actually, you are not her cousin."

"I am her almost-cousin, then."

"Which is still _not,_ in any way, related," Pax said.

"And even if she did fancy me—and there is just no way that could ever happen—she's not the type to snog a bloke all over the place like that article says. Vic is not _that_ type of girl."

"And what type is that?" Lavender snapped as she marched back into the kitchen. She was wearing trousers now, thank Merlin.

Teddy tugged on his collar. "You know—"

"No, I don't." Lavender folded her arms over her chest, her head cocked to one side. "Enlighten me."

Concentrating on keeping his eyes above Lavender's neckline, or below her knees, Teddy felt as though he'd been Petrified by that sharp stare. Merlin, she looked dangerous. Charlie put his paper down and looked from one boy to the other expectantly.

"Well," Teddy said, "the kind who snogs a bunch of guys all over the place."

"Some girls like snogging more than others," Charlie said. "And there is nothing wrong with that. They deserve the same respect from you boys as the girls who are more, um, reserved."

"Nothing wrong with a woman who knows what she wants, and goes after it," Lavender said.

"There certainly isn't." Charlie looked up at her with a smirk that made Teddy squirm.

"Ugh," Pax grumbled. "Absolutely disgusting. Remember this next time you think it would be cool to spend your summer hols in Romania with these two."

"Yeah, well, my gran is remarried," Teddy said. "How would you like to find the former Minister of Magic shirtless in your back garden?"

Charlie groaned. "That one even grosses me out; Andromeda is old enough to be my mum."

"Doesn't mean she doesn't have urges," Lavender said as she flounced out of the room again, honey hair bouncing behind her.

"Women are barmy, Dad," Pax said.

"Yeah, pretty much," Charlie agreed. He turned to Teddy with a serious look in his brown eyes. "I know we are taking the mickey here, Ted, but truth is, Victoire is probably going to be really upset by this. Who knows what kind of gossip this is going to cause up at Hogwarts once school starts? Be…nice to her."

"Charlie," Teddy scoffed, "I stopped pulling Vic's plaits ages ago. You don't have to worry about me."

oOo

"There is trouble in Harry and Ginny's marriage again," Percy announced.

"Why do you read that old hag?" Bill asked from the counter where he was stirring sugar into his tea.

"And Ron is mentally unstable."

"Well, obviously."

Percy chuckled. "And _you_, brother—"

"Wait? Me? How do I rate a mention in Skeeter's Column of Lies?" Bill walked over to the table and sat opposite Percy.

"We both do. We are mentioned under the heading of 'Sundry'."

Bill rolled his eyes. "I'm pretty sure reading Rita Skeeter qualifies you as an old woman, Perce."

"Would you like to know what she wrote about you or not?"

"By all means, carry on."

"Well, obviously a man as gruesome as yourself must have obtained your beautiful wife by means quite foul: possibly enchantment or blackmail."

"Naturally."

Percy chuckled. "Oh, and Fleur is 'doubtless empty-headed'*."

Bill snatched the paper out of his brother's hands and scanned through it until he found that particular quote. He groaned and tossed the offending rag aside.

"Best to destroy that before Fleur sees it, or we'll be having sautéed Skeeter for supper."

Percy was laughing as he picked the paper up again. "Oh, here we go again with poor Teddy. Harry's going to be livid… Oh, shite."

At the uncharacteristic swear word, Bill looked up. Percy looked an unlikely cross of nauseous and enraged.

"You better read this, Bill, second to last paragraph," Percy said as he handed his eldest brother the paper.

Bill did as he was told, his complexion flushing bright red and quickly elevating to magenta.

"That BITCH!"

oOo

Charlie looked up at the roar from across the camp. "Sounds like Bill's read the paper."

Teddy blanched. "Should I hide?"

"Did you do anything wrong?"

"Er, no?"

"Then sit tight, knucklehead."

oOo

"Oh, Merlin, that's terrible," came Roxy's voice through the flap of the girls' tent.

"Poor Vic, she's going to be mortified," Mol agreed.

Victoire froze in the act of opening the flap. Roxy and Mol were sitting with Dom on her bunk, the _Daily Prophet _spread open before them. Victoire didn't like bunking with the The Weasley Three; she always felt left out of their tight-knit bond. Most of the time, the elder girl was relegated to spending time with Lucy, Rose and Lilly, and being that they were 9, 6, and 4, that felt more like babysitting. Her one consolation was that Teddy and Pax didn't mind her tagging along so much now that they were older. Unless they were trying to impress other girls, that was. And when that happened, Victoire would rather not be around anyways.

"Uncle Bill and Aunt Fleur are going to go spare when they read this," Mol went on. "Do you think your mum will sprout feathers?"

"That is the dumbest thing you've ever said," Dom snapped. Her mouth was pinched and her eyes narrowed. "_Maman_ cannot sprout feathers. Or a beak, Rox, so shut it."

"It'd be really cool if she could, though," Roxy said with a big smile.

Dom shook out her strawberry blonde hair. "You think this Skeeter woman is still in Patagonia?"

"Not if she knows what's good for her," Mol said.

"Your dad is going to blow up when he see this," agreed Roxy.

There was a loud shout from two tents over. Victoire jumped. What could possibly have everybody in such an uproar this morning?

"That sounds like him now," Dom muttered. "How do we find out if Rita Skeeter is still in camp?"

"She'd be listed on the Press Passes," Mol answered.

"Do you know where the press camp is?" Dom asked.

Victoire decided this would be a good time to make her entrance. She recognized that tone in her sister's voice—she was plotting something. It was never good when The Weasley Three began plotting, and despite what Papa thought, Dom was almost always the instigator. Mol was good at logistics, and Roxy was in charge of supplies, but Dom was the mastermind.

"Morning, girls," Victoire sing-songed as she entered the tent.

Hurriedly folding up the newspaper, Mol stashed it behind her back. What could be in the paper that would have anything to do with herself, Victoire? She was fairly certain the last time she was in the paper was for her birth announcement. It wasn't as if she were so closely related to Uncle Harry to warrant press scrutiny.

"What are you three up to?" Victoire asked, narrowing her eyes at her sister and cousins.

Dom slid off the bed. "Now, Vic, you know better than to ask questions you don't want to know the answers to."

"Aunt Hermione calls it 'plausible deniability'," Mol added.

"Always a good thing when the three of you are involved," Victoire agreed. "What is in the newspaper?"

"Rita Skeeter says you're a slag who is snogging Teddy in every corner of the camp," Roxy answered.

Victoire's mouth fell open.

Mol hit Roxy with the newspaper. "This is why you are on a need-to-know basis."

"What?" Roxy held up her hands to defend against another attack. "It's not like she won't find out anyways."

"Enough, you lot," Dom said and she took the paper from Mol. "You'd better read this, Vic."

Looking at the newspaper as if it were a serpent ready to strike, Victoire slowly reached out her hand and took the offered news sheet. She scanned through Rita Skeeter's column. It was the usual tripe about Uncle Harry and his family. Some about Professor and Mrs. Longbottom and Mrs. Scamander. Oh, Victoire hoped that was true about Mrs. Longbottom applying to be matron at Hogwarts; she always liked Hannah Longbottom. She would sneak the children cookies on their way through the Leaky Cauldron. Plus, Victoire knew how much her Head of House missed his family while at Hogwarts.

Then she got to the part about Papa and _Maman_. Victoire frowned, an ache in her heart. How could anyone say that about her papa? As if looks were the only thing that could recommend a person. He was smart, funny and noble. _Maman_ loved him because he was the only one for her. Although, that bit about _Maman_ being empty-headed was _almost_ funny. It would be especially funny when _Maman_ saw it and flew into one of her Gallic rages.

And then Victoire came to the part about Teddy and…and herself. Her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach, and tears sprang to her eyes.

"B-but that's not true," Victoire whispered.

"None of it is true, Vic," Dom said kindly.

Victoire took a deep breath in and blew it out of her nose to keep from crying. "The kids at Hogwarts won't know that. They'll think I'm a-a hussy. And…and they'll know…"

"That you fancy Teddy?" Dom said softly, putting her arm around her sister's shoulders.

Victoire nodded.

"Well, everybody knows that," Roxy said.

Victoire made a distressed noise. Dom sent her cohort a nasty glare.

"Well, they do! Everybody but Teddy, that is. That boy is blind as a bat."

"Roxy has blundered onto a good point, Vic," Mol said. "Teddy will probably think this is all incredibly funny. _He's _not going to take Skeeter seriously."

Somehow, that made Victoire feel worse. Turning out of her sister's arm, Victoire ran out of the tent. The girls called after her, but she didn't stop. She didn't know where she was going, but she needed to be away. Tears rolled down her cheeks. She wished she had somebody to talk to, but her dearest friends were in England right now. That's where Victoire wished she was. Blast, she hated Patagonia!

oOo

Dom walked over to her parents' tent. Her papa could be heard ranting from five feet away, interspersed with rather shocking French. She had no idea her _maman_ knew such colorful words! Sticking her head in, Dom saw her parents in the lounge with Uncle Percy. Papa was pacing, his blue eyes snapping with fire. _Maman_ looked like she might sprout feathers after all. Uncle Percy was doing that thing Mol did where she tried to be reasonable in the face of everybody else's madness.

"Hey, kiddo, what's up?"

Dom looked at her godmother. "It's Vic, Aunt Audrey, she knows about the column."

Aunt Audrey frowned. "I told Fleur she needed to calm down and think of Vic first. Rita Skeeter will get hers in the end. Where is Vic?"

"I don't know. She ran off a few minutes ago."

"Poor kid," Aunt Audrey muttered. "Go back to your cousins. I'll get this lot thinking straight and we'll find your sister. And, Dom."

Dom looked at her aunt with wide eyes. "Yes?"

"Behave. You may have your papa fooled, but I know exactly what you are capable of getting up to. Same goes for my darling daughter."

Dom batted her eyes and put on a falsely sweet voice. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"Uh-huh."

Smiling sweetly despite her aunt's suspicious face, Dom made her exit. Returning to her own tent, she found Roxy and Mol waiting for her. Plopping down at the little table in the center of the room, Dom motioned for her cousins to join her.

"You know how Aunt Hermione told us that story about Rita Skeeter being an unregistered animagus?"

"Well, I don't know how much she was _telling_ us as we were eavesdropping," Mol pointed out.

"You are distressingly accurate," Roxy complained.

"Regardless," Dom interrupted, "we know that she can turn into a bug, right?"

"What are you thinking?" Roxy asked, scooting to the edge of her chair.

"Just that it's good that none of us are afraid of bugs…"

oOo

"Oh, Fleur, I was just coming to see you."

Looking up, Fleur saw Harry approaching her tent just as she was exiting it. She smiled at her brother-in-law but really had no time to stop and talk. She had been hoping to break the news of Skeeter's column to Victoire personally, but of course, it did not turn out that way. Her daughter was no longer a young child; Fleur could not stand guard between Victoire and the world the way she once did. This morning was an awful reminder of that.

"Good morning, Harry," Fleur said.

"I just wanted to stop by and apologize to you and Bill for the awful things Rita Skeeter wrote about Vic in her column."

"You do not owe us an apology," Fleur said. "You did not write zose zings."

Harry rubbed the scar on his forehead. "Still, if she wasn't related to me, she would have never been in the paper to begin with."

"Harry Potter, you cannot blame yourself because zis _Rita Skeeter_ is a horrible person."

"Well, if there is anything I can do…Hermione is already looking into a potential slander suit."

"_Merci_." Fleur smiled. "If Bill does not calm down, I may need you to Stun him and return him to England in restraints."

Harry chuckled. "I am Head Auror. I'm sure that allows me some jurisdiction here." His smile faded. "Seriously, though, I am sure that Teddy will do anything required of him to save Vic any humiliation at Hogwarts."

"I am afraid zee rumor mill does not work zat way," Fleur said with a sigh. "But I am sure Victoire will be grateful for his support."

"It makes it messier that she really does fancy him."

"_Oui_, it is one zing for zee whole family to know, but anozer to have zee zing you hold closest to your heart bared for public consumption. Especially when she is so young.

"Now, I must go find my daughter."

"Yes. Sorry. I'll just go talk to Bill."

Harry went into the tent. Fleur surveyed the camp grounds, wondering where a humiliated and heartbroken girl would run off to in the desert. The oasis was crowded with tourists, and there was no thicket of trees in which to hide, not even a bedroom in which to retreat. Perhaps she should begin with Molly and Arthur.

oOo

"How many do you have?" Dom asked.

Roxy held up a jar. "About a billion. Using our wands really made this job a lot easier."

They were in the thicket of tropical plants that surrounded the oasis, far enough away from the tourists to go undetected, but near enough to hear splashing and laughing. Patagonia had a fascinating and large array of bugs.

"We are going to get in so much trouble," Mol complained, even as she used her wand to Summon a flurry of gnats and deposit them in her jar. "We are underage. We are not supposed to be using magic. If my dad finds us—"

"We are surrounded by fully qualified wizards, relax," Dom said from where she squatted behind some sort of large plant that was munching on her ponytail.

"I hate it when you say that," Mol grumbled.

"There's a flaw in our plan, you know," Roxy said. She yanked Dom's hair away from the plant.

"Ow!" Dom stood up, hands on her narrow hips. "What would that flaw be?"

"Eventually our parents are going to notice we're missing and go completely spare."

Mol folded her arms over her chest. "Hm, that's a good point."

"Then we'll just need an escort to take us around the camp," Dom said.

"Who?" Roxy demanded. "Not even my dad is going to go along with this mental plan of yours."

Dom smiled mysteriously. "Oh, I've got somebody in mind."

oOo

Victoire felt a tap on her shoulder and looked up at her little brother standing over her. She was sitting on the ground behind the boys' tent because she didn't know where else to go. She wanted to be alone, but a small part of her wanted to go cry in her mother's arms.

_What's the matter? _Lou signed.

Wiping the tears from her face with her hand, Victoire replied, _A horrible woman said mean things about me in the newspaper._

_Why?_

_I don't know. She said I was snogging Teddy everywhere!_

Lou sat down beside her and patted her back.

_Teddy is going to know now. That I fancy him._

_You are giving him too much credit. _Lou laughed, his freckled face breaking into a stunning smile. He didn't even have all of his adult teeth yet, but his smile already made girls swoon.

_Teddy is not stupid,_ Victoire defended.

_He is when it comes to you._

_Go. Away. Lou. You are annoying._

"Victoire?"

Looking up, Victoire saw her mother standing over them. Gently, _Maman_ placed a hand atop Lou's ginger head to get his attention.

_I need to speak with your sister,_ their mother signed when Lou looked up.

Lou gave Victoire a lightning-quick hug before scampering off. His rare display of affection, awkwardly offered as it was, made Victoire laugh. When he was gone, _Maman_ took his seat in the sand. She offered Victoire a handkerchief, then daughter was crying into her mother's arms.

"Sh. Shh, _mon ange_," _Maman_ whispered after a while.

Sitting up, Victoire wiped her eyes with the sopping handkerchief.

"Tell me what part hurts zee most."

_What hurt the most?_ Victoire thought about it for a moment. It was terribly embarrassing to have her crush on Teddy revealed in the _Daily Prophet_, but it was true that almost everybody already knew. Having Teddy find out this way was humiliating, but also a little good. Maybe, if he knew how she felt, he would look at her differently? Plus, it eliminated the uncomfortable need to confess her feelings in person.

"That…woman…she made me seem so…loose," Victoire said as she stared at the handkerchief in her hands. "I've never even kissed a boy and now there will be these expectations. This-this last year, boys already seem to expect things from me that I'm not ready for."

_Maman_ cupped Victoire's chin in her hand and coaxed her into looking up.

"You are not loose. Even if you had snogged a boy, even if you snogged him so much that you had to breathe out your ears, you would not be a loose girl."

Victoire giggled.

"_Mon ange," Maman _said with a small smile. "Zere is no such zing as a loose girl. I am not saying zat you should kiss every boy you meet, but even if you did, you would not be a trollop. Zat is just old-fashioned zinking."

Victoire sniffed. "For being so old-fashioned, it doesn't stop the girls in my dorm whispering about how this girl is a slut or that girl is a slag, and now they are going to say it about me."

"Zat is unfortunately true." _Maman_ sighed. "If zey are your real friends, zey will know who you truly are, and zey will not believe zese lies, but it is more important zat you know it is not true. Do not let ozer's ideas of you shape who you are or how you zink about yourself. Not even mine."

That seemed like really good advice, but it also seemed almost impossible to follow. Victoire rested her head on her mother's shoulder. Mostly, she got on well with other girls from all houses, but Victoire did not like the idea of people whispering about her. She didn't want to open herself up to ridicule.

"_Maman_," Victoire said, playing with the necklace that hung down her mother's front. "Do you think that Teddy will notice me now?"

With a sigh, _Maman_ said, "I do not know. He is older than you, _ma petite_."

"Only by two years! Papa is much older than you."

"Yes, zat is true. But zose are a big two years right now. Maybe in time zey will be a small two years, but I do not zink zat time has come yet."

Victoire pouted. "I hope you're wrong."

"I am sure you do." _Maman_ laughed. "Until Teddy comes to his senses, zough, perhaps you should zink about snogging anozer boy."

"What!?" Victoire sat up and waved her hands about in wide circles. "I could never. Teddy is the only boy for me."

"I understand, but talk to your Aunt Ginny—maybe she will have some wisdom for you. And do not mention to your papa that I encouraged you to snog a boy."

"I'm not a baby."

Her mother tucked a hank of hair behind Victoire's ear. "You are his little girl, and zat is not going to change no matter how big you are."

_Maman_ stood and brushed dirt from her skirts then offered her hand to Victoire. She took it and let her mother help her up.

"Now, let us go see your papa. He was going mental the last time I saw him, but if he has calmed down, zen he will be very worried about you."

Taking _Maman's_ hand, Victoire felt much better for having spoken to her mother.

oOo

"No, whatever it is, I am not going to be a part of it."

The Weasley Three exchanged bewildered looks.

"Pax, you act as if we are up to something," Mol said, batting her eyes.

The older boy folded his arms over his chest. "Don't try the innocent act on me, you she-devils. I _know _better than to trust any one of you."

"Even if it gave you the chance to avenge your favorite cousin?" Dom asked, ending all pretense.

"Lucy?"

"Victoire!"

"Wait, why is Lucy your favorite?" Roxy asked.

"I was just kidding," Pax responded. "I don't like any of the lot of you, but I suppose Vic is alright. Lucy's not too bad either. You three are pains in the arse though."

"Well, you're at the bottom of our list too," Dom said, propping her hands on her hips. "Right next to frog spawn and Slytherins. That does not stop us from asking for a favor, unfortunately."

"We have business on the other side of the camp grounds," Mol explained.

"Business?" Pax asked and snorted. "You're 12."

"Be that as it may, we still need to be on the other side of the camp today, but our parents simply wouldn't sanction such an expedition."

Pax rolled his eyes. "Merlin's bollocks, Mol, did you swallow a dictionary?"

"Possibly," Roxy muttered.

"_Regardless_," Mol went on, "we need an escort. In short, we need you, Pax Weasley."

"What's in it for me?"

Dom heaved a resigned sigh. "We will be in your debt, of course, good for one return favor."

"Three."

The girls squealed in indignation.

"Three of you, three favors."

"Fine!" Dom huffed.

"I don't know how you got in Gryffindor. You are obviously a Slytherin," Roxy spit out.

"Just tell me when and where you'll need me."

oOo

"Hey, Uncle Bill, I haven't been snogging your daughter, I promise."

Looking up, Bill saw Teddy enter the tent, followed by Charlie.

"I didn't need you to tell me that," he said. "If I thought for a moment that shite in the paper was true, you'd already be dead."

Bill knew a moment's satisfaction as the lanky boy gulped and skittered around to sit next to Percy at the table. It was an unfortunate fact of Bill's life that he knew without a doubt that someday Teddy Lupin would be snogging his Victoire. Shite, the kid might even do more than that. Unless he was gay or stupid, he would one day notice that Vic was a beautiful girl and that she (inexplicably) fancied Teddy Lupin. Much to Bill's distress, he did not think Teddy was either gay or stupid—he could hope otherwise, but that wasn't going to make it true.

"You're being a bit melodramatic, aren't you?" Charlie said.

"You don't have daughters," Percy said. "You'd understand if you did."

"I've got Pax."

Percy pushed his glasses up. "And I am sure there are probably a dozen protective fathers out there who would love to hex him to bits."

Charlie grabbed a Butterbeer and sat down, tipping back in his chair. "Alright, William, so you are the much put-upon father of daughters, but you are also being a damn hypocrite. How many girls did you snog?"

"That is completely beside the point," Bill grumbled.

"Great Merlin's ghost," Audrey muttered, materializing from the bedroom. "I've married into a family of cavemen."

She played with Percy's curls as she walked by, and he got that damned goofy grin on his face.

"Don't mind me," she called from the kitchen. "Carry on with your grunting and drooling."

"She has a point," Charlie said.

"Remember that, Percy," Audrey said. She poured herself a cup of tea, then wandered back to the bedroom.

The men waited until Audrey was gone before they started laughing. Percy sent Charlie a sour look.

The tent flap opened and in walked Victoire, followed by Fleur. Vic's cheeks were tear-streaked. Earlier, Bill had felt such rage at Rita Skeeter, and a secret sorrow that his little girl was growing up to face a nasty world and he could do nothing to stop it. All that melted away. His Victoire was hurting and he could do what he always did.

When Bill stood, Victoire came straight into his arms. She was so tall now that her head fit just under his chin.

"I'm sorry that horrible woman made it sound like _Maman_ couldn't love you because of your scars," Victoire whispered into his ear.

For a moment, Bill was so surprised he didn't know what to say. Then he chuckled slightly.

"Is that what all the fuss is about?" he teased. "These old scars? Don't worry about that, Vic, your _maman_ will set Old Skeeter straight. Fleur's good looking enough for the both of us, after all."

Bill looked up and winked at his wife.

Fleur pursed her lips. "You forgot zee important part about my husband being brave, as usual."

"Hey, Vic."

Everybody turned to look at Teddy. He was standing up, his hands braced on the tabletop.

"I'm sorry for all this mess."

"It's not your fault," Vic said, leaning her head against Bill's shoulder.

"Maybe you two would like to talk in private?" Fleur said.

"Say what now?" Bill sputtered.

"Bill," Fleur warned with a glare.

"We'll just step outside the tent," Victoire said.

"And your papa will put a charm on zee flap so no one can eavesdrop," Fleur said.

"I will?"

"You will."

Reluctantly, Bill let Victoire go. These women, they were going to be the death of him.

oOo

Teddy pulled a bench over so that the two of them could sit down. He suddenly felt very nervous, but he wasn't sure why. It was just Vic—the girl he'd known for his whole life. She was beautiful, but she'd been that for his whole life, too. But Vic wasn't just pretty on the outside; she was beautiful on the inside as well. Teddy watched as she sat on the bench, her every movement graceful.

"Well, sit down, silly," she said, turning those big blue eyes on him.

Teddy flushed. "Um, yeah, okay."

Did he sit next to her? Well, there was nowhere else to sit, unless he sat on the ground. He looked at the sand, then at Vic. She was just Vic, the pigtailed girl who followed him around everywhere he went like a buzzing fly. Except she didn't have pigtails anymore, and he didn't mind so much that she followed him around. He rather liked it, matter of fact.

Swallowing hard, Teddy sat next to Victoire. She had her pale hands folded in her lap. She was the only one of Bill and Fleur's kids who had inherited Fleur's complexion. Every part of Vic was creamy white with a healthy pink glow. Well, every part that Teddy had ever seen, and she'd wore that red and white polka dot bikini to the oasis the other day, so he'd seen quite a lot.

"Was there something you wanted to say?" Vic asked. "About the article."

"Uh. Excuse me, what was that?"

"The article and what Skeeter said about us."

"Oh. Oh, yeah. Look I'm real sorry about that, Vic. I'm used to that sort of thing by now, but I know how much it sucks. And I know people believe it even if it is a pack of lies. People are going to think you snogged me now, and I'm sure that is the last thing you would want."

Teddy chanced looking up at Vic's face. She was staring at him, her pretty brow knit together. Quickly, his eyes dropped back to his lap.

"Why wouldn't I want people to think I've been kissing you?" she asked.

"Well, I don't know," he mumbled, sneaking a look at her from the corner of his eye. "You are beautiful and kind and I-I have blue hair and sometimes I trip over my own feet. Why would somebody like you _want_ to kiss somebody like me?"

Vic cocked her head to one side. She was worrying her bottom lip with her teeth.

"Don't fret," Teddy said. "I'll tell everybody it's a lie."

She was still staring at him. Teddy couldn't imagine what she must be thinking.

"Why do you suppose that Skeeter woman wrote that about us?" Vic asked.

Teddy shrugged. "Because she's a terrible person with a grudge against Uncle Harry, I reckon."

"And no other reason?"

"What other reason could there be?"

Vic muttered something under her breath that sounded like "Lou was right." Before Teddy could ask her to repeat herself, she leaned her head against his shoulder. She smelled like the sea even when she was away from home. Teddy couldn't help but smile as he took her arm and threaded it through his.

"I've always said," he started with a grin, "you aren't too bad for a girl."

"I think you're pretty great, too, Teddy. I always have."

oOo

"All right, you cast the spell on the tent?" Dom whispered to Mol.

"Yes. Anything inside should not be able to escape."

"Here she comes, you two!" Roxy half-whispered as she came at a jog. She passed her two partners-in-crime, headed in the direction of a grouping of water coolers they had chosen as a rendezvous point. They were the ideal cover: far enough away to not be perfectly obvious, allowing for easy escape, maybe even diversion if necessary, but they were near enough to witness the mayhem.

"Alright, do your thing, and quick," Mol hissed at Dom.

Pointing her wand at the jars strategically placed around the tent, Dom whispered the incantation that would loosen the lids, then levitated them off. Once done, she grabbed Mol's hand and they dashed in the direction of the water coolers.

As the two girls dodged behind the coolers with Roxy and Pax, they spied their quarry approaching the tent. Rita Skeeter was a bloated cow in puce satin robes, a magenta hat perched on her yellow curls, a long black feather curling out of it. The woman strode into her tent. The Weasley Three held their breaths.

"What exactly have you three done?" Pax asked. "We aren't going to be arrested, are we?"

"Shh!" Roxy hushed.

The tent in question seemed to sway slightly. Dom's fingernails dug into her palm. Then it definitely rocked. The flap flew open, Skeeter tried to run through the entrance, hit Mol's barrier charm and bounced back, landing on her bum, stubby legs sticking in the air. Roxy snorted. Skeeter scrambled to her feet and rushed to the entrance again. This time she stopped and touched the barrier, which wavered slightly. A haze of mosquitos, gnats and sundry other flying bugs swarmed over Skeeter's head. The woman batted at them with one hand, then the other. She stumbled back, arms flailing.

Finally, a blood curdling scream filled the air.

Dom smirked. "Ladies, I think our work here is done."

"You three are bloody scary," Pax whispered.

"Yeah, well, Rita Skeeter better remember that before she messes with my sister again."

Linking arms, Dom, Mol and Roxy headed back in the direction of the VIP camp. Pax took one more look at Skeeter thrashing about, shook his head and fell in step. This whole day had been bloody unbelievable, and they hadn't even made it to a Quidditch match yet.

* * *

*Quoted from Rita Skeeter's _Daily Prophet_ column "Dumbledore's Army Reunited at Quidditch World Cup Final" found on Pottermore.

A/N2: Thank you again to keeptheotherone. Look for her fic tomorrow, as well as _Faintest, Slimmest, Wildest Chance, _her epic, multi-chapter fic that is quickly coming to an end. It should be noted, however, that while the two of us inspired each other, we do not write in the same universe (mostly).


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